Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Pics!!! Finally...













Let's see how this works... Here are some pics with my new camera when we were at Perry Park on a picnic with my mom. I'm still learning... There are many terms I'm not familiar with in the area of photography. I love that it has a sports mode where if the button is held down it takes consecutive pictures while the subject is in motion as to not miss anything and get the best picture possible during an event or action. Very cool... :)

Blah Blah Blog

I definitely need to update this blog... It just hasn't been a priority lately. The last few months have been spent recovering from my last belly surgery and getting used to my own place, an apartment not to small and not too big but perfect for my five kids and myself. I have painted the kitchen and dining room sort of a yellow honey tea color. Thursday I will tape the living room and hallway to prepare for painting again. I love color!! It makes me feel alive! A medium brown for the hall and a green olive color for the living room. Taping is the worst part, though, well that and the brush painting around the windows, switches, and perimeter. Once it's time for the roller it goes so much faster. The impatient person that I am has to see progress or frustration starts to take over... I have some canvases also that I would like to paint. It's been so long. One of these days when the kids are at their dad's house I might just drag out the oils and be creative for a few hours. This place needs some personality! I love it though. It's clean, uncluttered, and my own space. We have everything we need and it's cozy.

Surgery was beneficial, finally. It was only supposed to be a belly surgery, laporoscopy, so they went in through my belly button, again, and two other places on each side but then realized there was too much scar tissue from all of the other surgeries so they had to open me up. I've never had a c-section but I guess that's what it looked like. I woke up with 14 staples across my belly between my hips in addition to the three little inch long incisions I thought I would only have. After the doc took the last of what was left inside along with the mass and moved my bowels back where they're supposed to be, I am pain free and everything has resumed to it's normal function. It's been a little over 6 weeks now and I think I may try to run on Monday. I've been lifting some weights at the gym and riding the bike but I have been released with no restrictions now so it's time to bust my ass in the gym before bathing suit season. I'm gonna be that hot mom at the beach this year. (laughing...)

As far as the divorce, it's pending... Some days it's easy and some are the hardest I've had to endure yet in my lifetime. The kids are getting used to this new lifestyle, some more slowly than others... Just have to keep smiling and stay positive. Things will be good.

Although I am by no means technologically impaired I have noticed that there hasn't been even one picture posted in this blog. So... since I just purchased a new Nikon I will have to remedy that very soon... like tonight! :)

Sunday, November 29, 2009

Captivating

My fingers have touched the corner of the tattered paper, anticipating the beginning of the next chapter of my life. So eager to turn the page, yet consumed with anxiety... Brian and I have agreed to separate. Hopefully this hiatus will alleviate some tension in the house for the kids and allow us to focus on working on some serious issues that have torn the ties that bind us as one. Fear of the unknown is making it difficult to be at peace, though. Our goal is reconciliation but there is always a possibility that the damage is too great...

Every once in a while I read something that makes an impression and gives hope.

"There is a radiance hidden in your heart that the world desperately needs."
Captivating, Unveiling the Mystery of a Woman's Soul
by John and Stasi Eldredge

It was like a whisper to my heart from the book itself

Those words really made me think while reading during quiet time here in the Mack house. Consider it a personal revelation. "She finds no romance except in novels, no adventure except on television, and she doubts very much that she will ever be the Beauty in any tale." Sounds sadly familiar... I would like to become truly captivating, become feminine and alive! For now though, it's a work in progress.

Another post filled with jumbled thoughts...

Monday, November 9, 2009

Grammar and punctuation... obviously not my forte considering the previous post was published with total disregard to formality.

Friday, November 6, 2009

leaves splashed bright with autumn color rained down from the barren limbs arched above the road, forming what the kids refer to as a tree tunnel. they gazed out the car window in silent awe at the rays of sunshine peeking in through the branches, gnarled like the gaunt weathered fingers of a decrepit old woman. the road twisted and turned in and out of tree tunnels, and thin wisps of leaf smoke danced in through the open car windows from the old farmhouse set back away from the road.

we arrive at the park armed with a football, a rake, drinks, and KFC, and begin the search for the ideal spot. conditions must be perfect they said, and rattled off a list of requirements: sunny, warm, filled with leaves, close to a trail... unable to contain their excitement, little blips of squeals and giggles escaped through their little hands clasped so tightly over their lips.

there it was through an opening in the trees! i passed out crispy chicken to my five little slobbering carnivores who, instead of sitting like well trained respectable boring children, decided to explore the grounds. i, on the other hand, sat on the rickety picnic table and watched them eagerly searching for squirrels and bugs and rocks, stuffing little treasures into their pockets as they go.

we climbed atop a fallen rotten tree covered with small mushrooms and bright green moss as if it were a balance beam with arms extended to either side then leaned over the side to count the rings. 99 years old! then we spent quite a bit of time walking along the creek listening to the sweet song of an unfamiliar bird and the babble of the water as it rushed over a sunken tree splintered by a lightning storm.

ethan navigated the way back out of the woods and we finished the adventure by jumping and dancing in a giant leaf pile and playing some football before heading back through the tree tunnels towards home.

Friday, October 23, 2009

Someday, someday soon I will update this blog...

Friday, August 21, 2009

What the hell kind of devil bird chirps at night...

My favorite movie quote of all time from Failure to Launch. I love Zooey Deschanel's character, she's so representative of my personality.